"I dont have any specific trauma. I've never been in a car accident and I wasn't bullied when I was little. So then why am I suffering so much on the inside? Why do I feel like the light on the inside is dim? Why do I have a hard time trusting myself and letting others come close?" This confusion exists in many clients who reach out and are brave enough to ask for help and begin therapy.Read More
Continuing upward on the stairwell of trauma healing is Phase Two, referred to by Herman as Remembrance and Mourning. This phase often involves treating the traumatic memory, by form of narrative processing or by working through secondary side effects that have been left on the mind, body or soul. Somatic psychotherapy, EMDR, expressive arts, IFS, TF-CBT and Ego State work, amongst other modalities, have been scientifically proven effective in treating memories without diving too deeply into the narrative, avoiding the risk of re-traumatization.
"I’ve been to therapy most of my life, and I feel like there’s this alluring concept of getting better”.
Allison sits across me, her body tight, shoulders leaned forward. I remember the first time we met, her eyes had darted across the room looking for danger, feeling hyper-vigilant, her body stuck in fight and flight response.
The line is thin.
The line of appreciating your parents for who they are and who they were as they raised you, while birthing your own inner voice of the kind of parent you want to be for your children.Read More
Are you in a process yet you feel like you're moving in a circular motion? You may be in a phase of growth that feels anything but that. We often seek within when there isn't an "answer" that comes rumbling from the heavens.Read More
How can we find peace in a world that seems anything but? Have you ever experienced the kind of morning where you wake up to upsetting news and find it difficult to put one foot in front of the other, let alone to take care of yourself?Read More
If the the word perfection nags at you, let's dig a little deeper. Now, if you're a real perfectionist, you're probably shaking your head saying "no", because you feel far from perfect.
Survivors of trauma, just like anyone else, deserve to be able to have meaningful love relationships. Yet, just like a traveler needs to plan ahead and pack their "kit for the road", trauma survivors may hit some tricky steps in building relationships and may gain from knowing possible worries, bumps or confusion that may come up along the way.Read More
Just this past week Time magazine published its cover page titled "Person of the Year 2017: The Silence Breakers". In there, Tarana Burke, creator of #metoo speaks about #metoo not just being a moment, rather it's a movement.Read More
What does it mean to feel safe? You feel safe when you know you're cared for, that you're protected from danger and you have someone who has their eye out for you. When you're choosing who to bring into your life, it's important to know how to assess the healthy people from the potentially dangerous people.Read More
Regardless of age, we all have an inner child. A younger version of self. A part that holds the past experiences alive and affects your day-to-day interactions. If you had your needs met as a child and knew your worth, you may have an easier time identifying, requesting and trusting in relationships.
How can you provide a framework for your children to develop into confident, solid individuals who can build meaningful lives? Let's take a look at the trajectory of a life. A child comes into this world seeking safety, seeking love, seeking connection and responsiveness.Read More
Do you ever feel like your mind is taking you down a slippery path of old, upsetting memories? Tough stuff you just can't seem to "get over" and keep ruminating? Your brain does this because of how the memory of the experience was stored. Some memories, feelings, thought patterns and sensations are arranged in a specific way in your brain, making it so incredibly challenging to end the ruminating.
When you go through a tough experience and feel overwhelmed, your brain cannot process information as it ordinarily does. Because the memory isn't properly "digested" in your memory network, when you're reminded of the event, you might feel as if it's happening, because the sounds, smells, images and feelings were frozen in time and haven't been sorted.Read More
What is this thing we call hunger? Hunger represents the physiological need to eat food. Feeling satiated is the absence of hunger. Appetite is the desire to eat food. When your belly is empty, the hormone called ghrelin is produced by the stomach triggering a hunger message. Satiety is the feeling of fullness that tells you to stop eating. Now let's look at emotional hunger, its sensations and how it plays itself out.
Do you ever find yourself scratching your head wondering "how will I find happiness"? There was a recent survey given to millennials asking them what their most important life goals were. Over 80% responded by saying they would like to get rich, and over 50% of the same group shared that they would also like to attain fame in their lifetime.Read More
Carl Rogers wisely says, “The curious paradox is that when I accept myself just as I am, then I can change.”
Forgiveness is one of the hardest lessons to learn and even more difficult to implement. At the same time, forgiveness is one of the first steps necessary in order to create a shift, a change, steering towards a new direction for yourself. How is it then, that we forgive ourselves for bad choices, habits, broken relationships, or having been stuck in the muck of "just getting-through-ness" for a while?Read More
What. Is. Happening. To. Me. In. A. Panic. Attack. I want to explain to you exactly what is happening to you when you're having anxiety or maybe even a panic attack. Knowledge is power. I know that when you feel anxious the last thing you have a sense of is POWER, so here is some information for you to hold onto. Here's whats happening in your brain.Read More