Tips to Help You Navigate Therapy Consults
Tips to Help You Navigate Therapy Consults
You are making an important decision when choosing a therapist that will help support you on your journey to health.
Most therapists offer a free 15-20 minute consult meeting so that you can both decide if the relationship will be the best fit. It’s important to make sure that the relationship between client and therapist is a good match in order to successfully achieve your goals.
How can you maximize your consultation and get the most out of this “interview”?
1} Do Your Research In Advance
You only have a short amount of time to figure out if this therapeutic relationship is worth investing in. Don’t spend that time asking questions that you can find out easily on the therapist’s website. Most therapists will have an FAQ section that might just have most of the answers you are looking for (click here for our FAQ section). Do your homework and make a list of questions you might have that are not easily found. You could also send these questions in advance by email so the therapist can be fully prepared for the meeting.
2} Ask the Right Questions
It can be really frustrating to have your consult session and forget all the important questions you wanted to ask. We have prepared a checklist for you so that you don’t miss any of the important stuff. Make sure you check off all of the answers that you have already found on the therapist’s website in advance and then add any others to the list that you can think of. Click here to download our “Therapy Consult Checklist.”
3} Know WHY Your Questions are Important
I can give you a long checklist full of brilliant questions, but if you don’t know why the questions are all that important, the answers will not be meaningful to you. Some whys are obvious, but others require a bit more understanding. Here are a few of the more critical points that are worth explaining more about;
Therapeutic Approach & Modalities Used
There are all different types of therapies and modalities that support different types of healing. Depending on your concerns, you might try to find a more collaborative setting or a more rigid approach; a specific ideological approach or a more eclectic approach; more creative methods or a more cognitive focused therapy setting. Some therapists recognize the importance of approaching every client through a trauma lens and other therapists won’t even know what that means.
Your success in therapy will lie in finding just the right combination of personal connection with the therapist, therapeutic ideologies that you identify with and the therapist’s use of modalities that you feel can help you reach your growth potential.
For example, at Integrative Psychotherapy we use a highly collaborative approach and integrate the best of all different ideologies and modalities. We use a range of approaches because we realize that every single client has different needs and connects with different combinations of treatments.
We truly believe that the most successful therapists will have an ongoing commitment to learning and continually be adding to their intervention tool-kit.
Credentials, Trainings & Supervision
You want to be sure that the person you are seeing is properly representing their level of experience, their training and their credentials.
Knowing the framework and governing bodies is important.
Psychotherapy is not just a science, it’s an art. It takes a lot of learning and supervised practice to be good at supporting healing journeys safely and sensitively.
A competent and honest therapist will know his or her limits and is upfront about what they can and can’t offer.
Finding a therapist who maintains supervision is also a good way to make sure that the therapist is not only honest in general, but that they are open and honest with themselves, actively looking for critical feedback from a mentor who will help identify and support their inevitable blind spots. Some therapists will also be part of a peer support network, for an added layer of quality assurance.
Setting & Assessing Treatment Goals
Sometimes the problem you think you have is not really the problem. During the first session or two, a therapist will get to know your history, core concerns, your day-to-day challenges, likes, dislikes etc. Depending on the concern, he or she might issue a formal assessment (sort of like a quiz) to help give more in-depth insights. At that point you might discuss treatment goals together and your therapist will develop a strategy to help you get there.
Since healing is dynamic and rarely linear, progress will be assessed and plans changed as needed. If you start to uncover layers that you never knew were there, these new discoveries will be incorporated into your treatment plan. Some therapists will do this process more formally (with protocols and explanations of each step) and others will operate more organically, allowing you to take the lead in each session, discussing current events and today’s challenges, while the therapist picks up on important themes and helps you go deeper on those topics.
Even when your therapist gives you the reins, the conversations will be directed to help you highlight certain themes, and focus on certain goals. You might not even be aware of shifts, and then you may have a moment when you look back and see that you have come such a long way and don’t know exactly how you got there. That’s why I say it’s an art; a good therapist will be guiding your process while fostering a sense of trust, autonomy, confidence and hope.
The Potential Upside of Working with a Therapist’s Intern
Some people only want to work with the most trained professionals and think that a new therapist might not have enough experience to support you. There are a few considerations that might help you rethink this; An intern will be a lot cheaper than seeing the principal therapist in a practice, but you will have all of the benefits of being guided by the pro. You will get the creativity and fresh eyes of a newbie who is overseen every step of the way by the expert. In our office, I oversee the care of all clients who see our clinicians and interns. We have regular check-ins and professional development. We are also blessed to have all different personalities and areas of focus in our office, so it’s easier to find the right fit for you.
For example, our interns are hand selected. Aside for being genuine, eager and caring, we only bring on interns who have years of experience in working in a counseling role or in the field psychology, so when they join our practice, they are already established. All of our staff have a unique vibe which helps us be able to match each client to a therapist who we think would be the best fit. We have weekly consults and staff meetings so all our staff learn from each other {and they have trained in many advanced trainings }.
Expectations & Professional Boundaries
Every therapist will have a different way of connecting with their clients. Some prefer texting while others will not allow for texting at all. In order to avoid contacting your therapist in a way that is not aligned with their guidelines, make sure to ask (if they don’t tell you) about their communication policy including after hours contact. It is really important for therapists to maintain personal boundaries with clients to protect the therapeutic work. Though the relationship is emotionally intimate, the boundaried therapeutic relationship protects the treatment frame and models how fantastic a relationship can be when there is mutual understanding and protection of personal space, while having a time and place to dive in to the deeper work.
4} Contact Your Insurance Provider & Make A Realistic Budget
Therapy is a financial commitment and not one that should be taken lightly. It can be helpful to know in advance if you have coverage and if not, it’s important to identify areas in your budget that you can adjust to support a realistic plan. Many good therapists offer sliding scales or will try to help offset time in therapy with educational materials between sessions.
There is no shame in exploring different ideas and asking questions. In certain districts, there are organizations and community centers that will offer subsidies. I know this task can be daunting for many people, so don’t be afraid to ask for help from loved ones or even mental health support lines.
5} Know What You Want
It’s interesting when you start to think about what you actually want out of therapy. It’s not uncommon for people to show up because they feel off and have no idea what they hope to accomplish, so don’t feel bad if this is a challenge. It can be helpful to identify your own goals, your main concerns and your expectations before your initial consult.
Here are some tips on what would be wise to NOT to include during this time:
Don’t tell the therapist your whole life story.
Stick to your core concerns and keep it focused on themes (boundaries, anger management, anxiety, depression, bipolar, family of origin issues, neglect, relationship issues, parenting)
Don’t ask the therapist for quickie tips
Fro dealing with your "mommy-issues" or your difficult boss during the consult. Stick to, “I’ve been having relationship issues lately. I tend to overthink things & I’m very anxious. Is this the sort of thing you normally deal with? What sort of approach might you take?”
You won't get an answer to a long-time issues you've been navigating. You may get a sliver of insight but the work is for session time.
Don’t make assumptions about the therapist based on word of mouth.
You can use a recommendation as a good base, but the call is about your sense of who they are. A lot of therapeutic success is based on relationship connection. Obviously reputation is important but if you have heard rumors about personality or level of warmth, don’t come into the consult assuming you will feel the same way your friend did. Different people connect with different people (learn more about transference and countertransference here.)
Think of it as speed dating.
You have 15 minutes to size up the therapist enough to decide if you want to take this relationship to the “next level”. What is a perfect fit to you might not be a perfect fit for your friend. Notice if there is potential there.
Don’t spend the time asking questions you could have easily found out on the therapist’s website or on their social media pages
You can for sure ask for clarification like, “You mentioned on your website that you do EMDR, what level of training in EMDR do you have (there are basic levels and advanced skills/levels) If a skill is listed, ask about their training- you want to be sure someone has the skills they are actually saying they offer. You can also ask " Do you know how to work with someone who is very closed off? or skeptical" You may need someone to be gentle and patient while your defenses soften and you build trust.
Don’t be shy about asking any of the questions on the checklist.
Any competent therapist should be comfortable answering the basics. I know it can be awkward to talk about money or you might feel like it’s confrontational to ask if they are in supervision or who their supervisor is, but I can assure you, you have every right to ask these things. Therapy is a big investment and you deserve to know the basics before you start.
Don’t ask the therapist personal and irrelevant questions like
“What’s your maiden name”, “Where were you born” or “What are your sibling’s names?” That is not appropriate. Every therapist sets their own boundaries when it comes to sharing personal information, but the consult call is not the time to explore those boundaries.
As you hop on your next consult call, I invite you to hold these pointers in mind.
And if you’re ready to book a consult call with our staff to see if we have a therapist who can be a good fit for you, reach out here.